Creative Conversation … with Stephanie Bond Abu Ali in Jerusalem

Teachers in classrooms have little idea where the journey of life may take their pupils. I first met Stephanie Bond as a pupil in one of my classes in Northern Ireland. I remember her as an extremely talented linguist, a formidable debater in a team that won regional and national awards, and a committed Christian. It has been fascinating to see Stephanie’s life unfold, moving from Ireland to Jerusalem. I am very grateful that Stephanie has kept in touch and am particularly delighted that she has accepted my invitation to bring you this remarkable Creative Conversation at Easter. There is Kitchen Inspiration too, as Stephanie and her mother-in-law have kindly agreed to share a very special family recipe with us. Last but not least, there is as an opportunity to learn about and support the humanitarian work Stephanie leads with her husband Manuel, through their charity, Middle Eastern Christian Aid.

Stephanie, you were born in Ireland but now live in Jerusalem. Tell us about your story.

I first came to Jerusalem on a tour with my school and then decided to return to volunteer as part of my gap year. Long story short, I met my husband as he was sent to pick me up from the airport when I arrived to volunteer. We got married in Jerusalem and then settled here permanently after I had graduated from university in Belfast.

I didn’t really have any preconceived ideas about the ‘Holy Land’ growing up, other than the scenes we so often see in Bible stories. And I knew there was some sort of conflict going on there. It’s quite a complex society, so you don’t see much of that when you come on a standard tour. One of the things I do enjoy about living here are the vast contrasts that exist. You can find modern cities full of high-tech industry and shopping malls, or you can walk ancient stone streets and shop in bustling souks. You can spend a Saturday on stunning beaches on the Mediterranean Sea, snorkeling in the Red, or even floating on the Dead Sea. When you get bored of daily life you can drive for half an hour and feel like you have travelled to another country. 

However, the ongoing conflict here does present significant challenges. We frequently travel through military checkpoints. There are a lot of people with extremist views which does make you wary for your safety sometimes. We are careful about what language we are heard speaking, or what we wear in certain areas. Following the outbreak of war in October 2023, communities got closer knit while the divisions between them only deepened. We became even more security conscious. There were too many people acting dangerously and with impunity on the streets. For example, we used to take our children to a play area outside Jerusalem’s Old City walls. We noticed a lot of the parents there suddenly started carrying weapons and we decided to stop going after our then two-year-old daughter bumped against a father’s M16 that he had swinging nonchalantly from his shoulder. Recently, air raid sirens and being woken up by the noise of explosions from missiles has become ‘normal’. Even as I’m writing this, alerts of incoming barrages are flashing up on my phone.  Unfortunately, there are no bomb shelters in our area. 

Have you found it easy to integrate into local life?

Certain factors have made it easier for me. I had spent a lot of time here before coming to live here full-time which gave me the chance to get to know the culture and customs slowly. The Middle East has a very tribal mindset. This can make integration difficult as, although people are generally friendly, you are ultimately viewed as an outsider. I experienced this much less being married into a family here. We live in a Christian majority area meaning we are surrounded by like-minded people culturally. It would be more of a challenge living in other areas. I know some friends from other countries who have struggled living in a place with such a divided society. But I was well used to navigating that from growing up in Northern Ireland! 

What does a typical week look like for you?

My typical week is very ordinary and filled with everyday tasks such as school runs, work and grocery shopping. The special thing about living here is there will be surreal moments in the middle of the mundane. We will go to have pizza with friends and find ourselves eating in the shadow of the Church of the Nativity, or go to a relative’s house for coffee, look out the window and see the Dome of the Rock! I try not to take these sacred snippets for granted.    

Have you learned any new languages?

I can converse reasonably well in Arabic and I know enough Hebrew to get through a checkpoint or order an iced coffee – that covers the essentials! I loved learning languages in school. We had such a structured language learning experience with a focus on grammar, whereas I have had to learn by listening to others speaking here. I was shy to speak at the start and made mistakes for a long time. But eventually you have to just go for it and start speaking if you really want to learn. It also helps to listen to music and watch TV shows or movies in the target language, to get the language and its mannerisms into your head. 

I believe the cultural dimension of language learning is particularly important, especially when introduced at a young age. It teaches life skills. It exposes learners to the idea that other people may live and think differently, fostering a constructive appreciation of diverse perspectives. I was also fortunate to study politics at school, and then law and politics at university. I participated in debating competitions too. These opportunities developed the skill of giving fair consideration to differing views and the underpinning reasons behind them, without necessarily being in agreement. This is a key skill in everyday life, not just when confronted with people from a different culture. I don’t think education should be limited to the acquisition and repetition of factual knowledge. Rather, it should cultivate critical thinking, curiosity, and an openness to diverse perspectives.  

Is there a vibrant cultural scene?

Yes, but I would say that is smaller than it could be because it is yet another thing that is mostly divided according to what community you are a part of, at least in Jerusalem. Restrictions on freedom of movement and the resulting lack of resources in some areas limit the cultural scene to a degree. Language and religious differences can also be barriers to participation. The culture I have mostly experienced here is Arab Christian. Oral story telling is a big part of that culture, and traditional forms of song and dance are always a part of events such as weddings. 

Psalm 122 tells us to pray for the peace of Jerusalem. Do you have any advice to help us with that?

This Psalm was written during ancient times, but the peace of Jerusalem has both local and global implications today. Jerusalem is one of the main sticking points in resolving the whole Israeli-Palestinian conflict. It raises major questions: Whose capital city is this? Should there be two states and a shared capital? Should there be just one state?

On the streets there is the so called ‘hummus war’ as Jerusalemites fight over ownership of the famous dish so connected to the land. The whole Israeli-Palestinian conflict can’t be resolved until the future of Jerusalem is decided upon. This has rather large repercussions, because the Israeli-Palestinian conflict has been used as a catalyst for much larger-scale war. The most current example is the ripple effect that October 7^th has had throughout the entire region. It has led to regime change in Syria and the ongoing war involving the US, Israel, Iran, Lebanon and the Gulf States that has tabloids exclaiming we are headed for World War 3. 

Thus, praying for the peace of Jerusalem is crucial. When we pray for Jerusalem, we must pray for all of her people and remember that they are real individuals. The situation cannot be reduced to a simple narrative of good versus evil, nor should any group be ‘othered’. Instead, people must learn to hold contrasting and competing truths in tension while praying for peace between those who hold them. We should pray that, one day, the ‘hummus war’ will end with neighbours who look very different dipping from the same dish. 

Tell us about the charity you have established.

My husband, Manuel, and I established Middle East Christian Aid (MECA) to give tangible to support to Christian and minority communities in the Middle East. In 2015, we saw how Christian communities were decimated by IS and we felt called to help. The Middle East is highly tribal, and for minority communities—especially Christians—this often means vulnerability, isolation, and even persecution. There is very little support or protection given by governments. A huge number of people in the West also don’t even know that Christian communities exist here. As a Middle Eastern Christian, Manuel was painfully aware of this, so, we went to Jordan to deliver emergency aid to Iraqi Christians who had fled IS.

We have since officially registered MECA as a charity in the US and registered under Stewardship UK. We have worked in Jordan, Israel, Palestine, Syria and Lebanon. Major needs right now include humanitarian aid for families affected by ongoing conflict and economic hardship. We are also building a scholarship fund to help children, primarily from Christian communities in Jerusalem and Bethlehem to access quality education. The schools providing quality education tend to be private and many families can no longer afford school fees.

If readers want to help you in your work, how can they do that?

Readers can visit our website or our social media pages on Facebook and Instagram to check out what we’re doing. We are hoping to be able to do some relief aid work over the Easter period in Jerusalem and the surrounding areas. People are really struggling due to the economic fallout of the war. 

What is Easter like in Jerusalem?

It still feels surreal celebrating Easter in Jerusalem. There are special celebrations commemorating the events of Holy Week. I think my favourite is the cinematic experience of crowds walking down the Mount of Olives waving palm branches and singing ‘Hosanna’, just as they did over 2000 years ago. Another highlight is ‘Light Saturday’. The Orthodox church believes that ‘holy fire’ comes out of the tomb in the Holy Sepulchre on this day, and thousands of pilgrims stand to catch the fire on candles. There are planes waiting to fly it all around the world. I don’t know that I believe that it is miraculous fire but it’s a beautiful metaphor for how the Gospel spread across the globe from Jerusalem.

People here don’t say ‘Happy Easter’. They use the greeting ‘المسيح قام’, ‘Christ is risen!’, and then respond with ‘حـقاً قـام’, ‘Truly He is risen’. This tradition echoes right back to the news of the resurrection spreading at the very first Easter.

Families visit each other. They enjoy special Easter biscuits, dyed eggs, and having coffee together. Easter Sunday dinner is usually roast lamb or rolled grape leaves and small courgettes stuffed with spiced rice and meat, a local speciality. It’s usually a beautiful, sunny season, full of light. Everyone thought we would finally celebrate freely after war disrupted celebrations for the past two years, but it looks like we will find ourselves in a situation of conflict again this year. 

What have you learned about hospitality, in Ireland and the Middle East?

The Middle East is renowned for its hospitality. My experiences have mainly been of Arab Christian hospitality and I think it has lived up to its strong reputation. People in Ireland are no less hospitable, but Middle Eastern hospitality is very rooted in traditions and more formal. When you visit a house here you would expect to be offered certain things. First, a cold drink and a selection of roasted nuts and other nibbles. Then something sweet perhaps. Dark Arabic coffee is served last and this signals the end of the visit. Being a good host is a real source of pride and honour. Sometimes this creates a burden. When we have visited families to deliver relief aid, they will still graciously offer everything that they can, even when they have so very little. I think there is less of a sense of obligation when hosting in Ireland.

Do you enjoy shopping for food and cooking?

I grew to like cooking over time. Some dishes here take some time to prepare so family members will often cook together. I think cooking together with others helped me grow to enjoy cooking generally. We mostly go to a regular supermarket for the majority of our food shopping but I enjoy going to smaller speciality stores for certain ingredients. People look forward to seasonal produce a lot more here than in Ireland. It is fun to shop for it in small greengrocers, and people from villages will come and sell their produce on stalls on the streets or from the back of their vans. Easter, for instance, is the season of green almonds and fresh, green chickpeas.

Would you be willing to share a recipe with us?

One of the best treats at Easter is ma’moul. These are Easter biscuits made from a delicate, buttery semolina dough. They are stuffed with dates or chopped nuts dressed in simple syrup, and all of this is fragranced with cinnamon. The biscuits are made in different shapes. The ridged design of the date ma’moul represents the crown of thorns worn by Jesus on the cross, whereas the rounded nuts design is said to represent the stone rolled away from the empty tomb. Ma’moul are intricate and a bit of a labour of love! Most often, family and friends sit and make them together and enjoy this pre-Easter ritual. Every family has their own recipe and ingredients are usually ‘eyeballed’ rather than measured. I’m sharing the recipe of my mother-in-law who is a fantastic cook and host. The recipe can be scaled up or down and flavourings adjusted to taste.

Ingredients

For the dough

200g unsalted butter

1kg semolina

Arabic gum – 4 small pieces ground (optional for flavour)

Mahlab – quarter teaspoon ground (optional for flavour)

Yeast – half teaspoon

Rose water – 1 tablespoon

Pinch of salt

Warm water – quarter-half cup

For the stuffing

Dates – 1kg

Butter  (room temperature) – 50g

Olive oil – 1 tablespoon

Pinch of salt

Cinnamon – quarter/half teaspoon

Nutmeg – Quarter teaspoon

Method

Melt the butter and mix it into the semolina. Ensure the grains of semolina remain separate, not clumped together. Leave the mix for the butter to absorb for at least 8 hours. The mix can stay in the fridge for up to two days. Rub the mix with your fingers 2-3 times during this time to ensure no clumps form.

To prepare the stuffing, de-seed the dates and put them in boiling water for 10 mins. Remove from the water and peel off the skin and the white pith from inside. Place in a food processor with the other stuffing ingredients and blend until smooth. This can also be done by hand.

Take your semolina and butter mixture and add the other dough ingredients. Start by adding only quarter cup of water. Work the water into the dough, gently kneading it. It can be easier to knead in smaller sections. Do this until you can make a ball with the dough and flatten it without it cracking. Add more water as needed. Then, leave the mix to rest for half an hour.

To assemble the ma’moul, take one tablespoon of dough and flatten it in a circle on your palm. Then, take roughly one teaspoon of the stuffing and flatten it into a circle on top. Fold in the edges so you have a circle and use your finger to make a small hole in the middle, making the stuffing visible. You can use a fork to add designs to the edges if you wish. 

Heat oven to 180 °C and bake biscuits for around 10-15 minutes or until golden. Serve topped with powdered sugar.

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Are there any Scripture passages that you find particularly helpful or inspiring?

“These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” John 16:33.

I have this written on a small card from a church event many years ago. I always seem to come across it again at just the right time.